April 08, 2003

War Bytes

News Channel Anchor: Now we can cross over live to Blahdad where our correspondent is in Bedlam Whosane's bathroom. Of course, he is not allowed to say where he is. So we will pretend that we do not know. Halter Badgers, describe the scene to us without telling us anything that you are not supposed to say.

Halter Badgers: I am somewhere between the shower and the the bath tub, I cannot reveal the precise location due to operational security reasons. From what I can see, the Hippublican Bards seems to have cleared off in a hurry. There are signs of a struggle everywhere, with fancy soaps and towels strewn all over the floor that could not be nicked by the ones on the run.

The Brigade Commander of the unit I am "inbedded" with tells me that he has been busy all evening sticking chewing gum over the symbols of the regime. According to him, it sent a powerful message that they could chew and stick anywhere they please, at a place and time of their choosing. Back to you now.